More hockey horrors...

You can tell it's been a slow day at Breakaway HQ, can't you? After the post yesterday about comedy looks in the EIHL this season, Matt pointed out that I'd missed Joe Tallari's effort in the Bad Facial Hair Hall of Fame. Perhaps this is because the shifty forward is always moving too quickly for me to catch it, or maybe I was hypnotised vs the Phoenix by the boy-band refugee that is Brian Passmore, but, as Matt says, that truly is epic-observe the way he's left it bare under the nose just so...

I also forgot this gem-it's Andre Payette rocking the kinda-sorta-mohawk. A long way from his time at the Blaze, where his matinee-idol highlighted hair clashed somewhat with the rugged bruiser underneath...

Making a run at Joe Tallari's "interrupted" image is Patrik Wallenberg of the Panthers. Has someone just drawn on his face with a crayon and forgotten to fill in a bit? The style in itself you can get away with-but at least try and make it all the same length...

Finally, we have the Bison's Steve Thornton. Great, great, player. But awful, awful dentistry...

One addition to the Halloween costumes mentioned below, by the way...and it goes across the Irish Sea.

Zombie: Troy Neumeier (Belfast): If you've seen the Giants' veteran d-man skate, you'll know why. He moves with all the pace and shambling gait of one of the newly-undead attempting to catch a screaming maiden. The difference is, this time she'll get away. Much like the vast majority of opposition forwards do, given a bit of space...

Now I really am done-I have to prepare myself for a night with horrific, scary hooded creatures who hunt in packs, attack without mercy and growl in voices no human can understand. That's right-I'm braving a trip to Coventry City Centre for a night out with my rocker friends, and we're already stocked up on garlic...:)

Back tomorrow with Round the Rinks as per usual-until then, keep keeping your eye on the puck...

Halloween Hockey, or Things That Go Bump On The Ice...

Notice that chill in the air? It is, of course, All Hallows Eve today-a day when traditionally all beings scary, nasty and horrifically ugly are allowed to romp and play for the last time before All Saints' Day breaks the day after. Obviously in recent years a few of those beings have slipped through the net after Halloween though, as the continuing presences of Jeff Legue (scarily good) Brad Voth (big and nasty) and Ed Courtenay (well, this one should be obvious) :) on the rinks of the UK will testify...

One of the major fun parts of the 31st October for many, though, is the excuse to dress up. And those players, referees and club staff we go to watch at the rinks of the UK are no different...So here's some ideas for costumes for them. Picked with the greatest of care, naturally.

A Donkey: Andre Payette (Newcastle): Well, it's only fair-after all, that's what everyone outside of Newcastle (and even some inside) seem to think would be the perfect costume. According to many he wouldn't even need to act.

An Executioner: Robert Stancok (Nottingham): Anyone who's ever seen him swinging that stick of his into the bodies of opposition forwards will know that, when it comes to wielding a weapon, the Panthers' Slovak d-man has no equal. Good job the "blades" of these sticks aren't razor-sharp.

The Grim Reaper: Adam Calder (Coventry): Seriously-has anyone ever seen him smile during a game?

An Angel: Todd Kelman (Belfast): No other costume would suit this paragon of virtue, who never does anything wrong and thus is perfectly entitled to protest violently from the bench at every single penalty given to his team. And if he takes a penalty himself? Better get the earplugs ready...

A Devil: Danny Stewart (Coventry): Stewie just loves to cause trouble-one of the few players I can think of who will be pushing and shoving with a grin on his face. And no-one is better at the cheeky little tap with a stick which is just soft enough not to be called a slash...

Chainsaw Kid: Peter Campbell (Belfast) : Just have a gander at his picture on the Belfast website. That serial-killer stare was last seen on Michael Myers in Halloween, I think...Just try not to make him angry.

Town Crier: Dave Simms (Sheffield): Well, town criers like to shout a lot whether people are listening or not, don't they?

Pinocchio: Simon Mangos (Manchester): Ed Courtenay was the obvious choice here, but given that he's still to come further down, instead we pay tribute to the nasally-advantaged Phoenix defenceman.

The Baby: Ed Courtenay (Belfast): Toys and pram are optional extras-especially since you would be spending half the night picking the toys up from where they'd been thrown. And a grown man spitting out a dummy could really do some damage if he managed to hit someone, so you'd probably have Health and Safety on your back as well.

Damian, The Omen child: Jake Riddle (Hull): Look at him. He looks about twelve years old (although slightly big for his age). But as soon as he gets on the ice, all that innocence disappears.

There you are, for now...don't get too scared this evening, and keep keeping your eye on the puck...