Hearing Things...Odds and Ends

Apologies if this post is somewhat disjointed-it's more to clear up several odds and ends from the last week or so in British hockey than anything else, and ranges from dirty hits to music to idiot footballers-turned-pundits. Also included is a very angry French-Canadian...

Last night the DJ saved my life: Well, nothing so drastic, but surprising nevertheless. It appears that my "hockey music" rants have either struck a chord, or maybe someone was just feeling a bit rebellious, but either way I was amazed and pleased on Sunday night to get a nice long burst of "Master of Puppets" (one of my ten songs every rink must have") during a outbreak of pushing and shoving in the Blaze-Hull game. Not only that, but the rink also rang to "Dressed to Kill" and even a very brief burst of Rammstein. Now, if we could just leave that infernal "Chelsea Dagger" to Nottingham, then things could really start looking up for us rockers at the Skydome. They'd still have a way to go to beat Manchester though-Matt informs me further that even their intro gets a nice burst of Saliva behind the intro video...and for the electro fans there's Depeche Mode amongst others.
Keep flying the flag, Phoenix-and hopefully the other rinks will follow suit...:)

In other news, football involves a lot of overpaid young men chasing a pig's bladder around a glorified park: Or, at least it does if you use the same "only use stereotypes" approach as Talksport DJs Adrian Durham and ex-footballer Ian Wright, who described ice-hockey as "nothing more than men dancing and fighting on ice" amongst other things. Ian Wright's pearl of wisdom was "it's cold in there. Although I guess it has to be otherwise the ice would melt". Aside from the obvious fact that neither of them have been seen around the rinks of the UK, I wouldn't mind seeing them saunter up to, say, Chris Pronger (6'6, 210lbs) and challenge him to a game of "dancing on ice" just to see how long they'd last. It's been mentioned that the EIHL should respond to this by offering the two "experts" concerned tickets-I have a feeling they'd suddenly be too busy watching a Ryman League game to accept. But come on, EIHL-at least try to change this image in the media...

NHL's "crackdown on hits from behind and/or to the head" is working. Honest: After all, there's only been three serious injuries caused by head hits since the NHL announced that they would come down harshly on offenders. The latest one is Patrice Bergeron, who was the victim of this hit three days ago. This follows Dean McAmmond on the end of this atrocity from Steve Downie last month, for which Downie got 25 games, and this assault from Rick Rypien on Mathieu Roy two days afterward, for which Rypien got...nothing, as far as I can tell.
But hey-so long as the sports anchors are talking about the sport on US TV, even if they are all saying that it's dangerously violent, then who cares?

"Hold me back! No, seriously...I'm really angry. Look-I'm making scary faces and everything!": Are there many sights more entertaining than hockey players pretending to be angry? We were treated to just such a sight on Sunday at the Skydome as Sylvain Cloutier went utterly gonzo at Paul Cabana late in the third period, requiring two linesmen to prevent him breaking free after the Hull forward said something. Cabana obviously realised he'd bitten off more than he could chew as he disappeared pretty quickly behind Jake Riddle and then put up only token resistance to being held back on the boards as Cloutier fought to get to him through a scrum of players while Riddle fought to get through to Clouts to back up his team mate. While all this mayhem was going on, involving Cloutier and Riddle exchanging cross-checks before being separated by being bodily dragged away, you could almost see Cabana, a short distance away from the mayhem he'd started, talking to the referee...
"That's it, grab my arm-I'm gonna pretend to shove you now, look startled...that's good...now I'm going to go left-block me-no, look like you're trying hard...there you go..."

And finally, in the spirit of Halloween: Is it just me, or are the players this year some of the most entertaining-looking in a while? Ever since Scott Young's flowing blond locks disappeared from the UK rinks, comedy looks have been few and far between. However, this season at the Skydome we've already had Ryan Smith's (Belfast) lanky serial-killer locks, Scott Fankhouser's (Manchester) natty little "fifties movie villain" 'tache, and, top of the heap, Rob Rankin (Hull) with his 70's porn-star goatee, which led to people round me making "He's come to fix the fridge, not play hockey" jokes every single time he came down our end. It seems the facial hair silly season has started early this year, and almost makes up for Mike Garrow (Cardiff) shaving off the goatee which made him a dead-ringer for Chuck Norris in his last spell in Wales-although, frankly, there's still time for him to grow it back.

Perhaps, some time in the future (i.e tomorrow) I'll come up with "top ten Halloween costumes for hockey players", but until then, keep keeping your eye on the puck...