Scream If You Wanna Go Slower...

"Cause everybody's shaking like the end of the world.
And everybody's waiting on the end of the world"
The Gaslight Anthem: "Say I Won't (Recognize)"


"The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming. You'd better run"
Florence and the Machine: "Dog Days are Over"


Remember those heady days in Britain, when salaries rose like rockets, and in the world of British hockey, particularly the EIHL, the talk wasn't about who was breaking the wage-cap in the EIHL, but just who was breaking it by the biggest margin, fuelled by the income stream from fans who could soak up any increase in ticket prices as long as they got to watch hockey-and more than that, were prepared to do so?


Well, like the fairytale-built-on-borrowed-money that was daily living in the last few years in the world outside the ice-rink, they're dead now-killed fast, brutally and extremely noisily by the credit crunch, spiralling costs of "keeping the world safe"/"unjust wars" (depending on your political persuasion) and thieving bankers (a view almost everyone agrees on). Only certain sections of British hockey don't seem to realise it yet.

Coventry have just released the prices for their pre-season games, which has started a fantastic debate amongst fans, given that they're at the bargain, reduced-from-regular-season cost of...erm...fifteen quid-an amazing zero-percent discount. For comparison, Sheffield and Nottingham are putting their warm-up games on for twelve and ten pounds (25% and 33% off respectively), and the Blaze are the only ones (as far as I can tell) stinging their recession-bloodied fans for full price to see what, essentially, are meaningless "get to know you" games.

I should point out at this point that, being a young, single bloke with very few (relatively) financial commitments, I am very lucky, in that this will not affect me beyond, perhaps, spending a little less over the month on amusements than I have been doing all summer, and £45 over the course of a month is doable-after all, I shall be spending more than that for the other seven months of the year, and quite frankly I would go and watch a hockey almost anywhere if a Coventry team were involved (well, with the exception of the Chargers)-indeed, I sustained my hockey fix over the early part of the summer with the help of the ENL and Coventry Phoenix women's teams-although the second one at least was helped by being friends with some of the players...and was free.

However, if you're a family of four, even to attend the Aalborg game (return of Neal Martin and Jody Lehman to the Skydome, which, let's face it, is the major reason most people will go, however much the Blaze claim that they chose the opposition based purely on the "high standard" and didn't even think about the fact that they'd get an extra 250 or so through the door based purely on the fact that these two ex-Blaze stars are playing-an excuse which holds about as much weight as an anorexic tapeworm) will cost £38 quid for two adults and two under-16s. Or, to you, family of four with one kid 16 or over...£52. Per game. Before the "proper" stuff starts.

Ow.

Although, saying that, I suppose the Blaze have to make the eight thousand quid a month rent they're paying for the giant white-elephant that is Crosby's somehow, on top of the player's wages...

I ask the marketing gurus amongst you, though...how many families are going to pay £120 in two weeks to watch three warm-up games...even allowing for the "first game of the season" and "Blaze legend" pulls of the Sheffield and Aalborg matches? Especially when that £120 is needed just to keep them clothed, warm and fed in these tricky economic times, and there's a good chance one or both of the parents is recently unemployed? (For reference, the West Midlands has statistically been one of the worst places for job-losses in the current recession-look it up).

OK, I've singled out the Blaze here, perhaps unfairly, but look around the rest of the league, once the season starts, and you wonder what planet some owners are on. Clearly one where they can afford to pour money into their clubs-because looking at the quality of the rosters in general, one can only assume that the wage costs are as high as ever, especially with the weakened pound meaning that imports can, effectively, justify higher wage demands than they'd normally give. It can't be long before fans effectively turn round and start with the little things, like deciding they can do without a replica shirt this season, or merchandise that previously they'd have snapped up. From there, particularly if teams aren't as good as promised, it's a short step to picking and choosing games, lower crowds, and all that that entails.

Oh yes, and don't rely on sponsorship to bail your team out either, Mr & Mrs Hockey Team Owner. The Sheffield Steelers have just had their title sponsor Eurologix pull out, with the mantle taken up by the thriving giant that is local sparky (admittedly on a big scale) Field Electrical Services, and the Blaze going from a national construction company to Coventry Plumbing and Heating Supplies, a local plumber's warehouse. Tellingly, both these sponsors were previously sponsors of the respective teams in some way, but nowhere near the most lucrative...

Now, I don't doubt that these sponsors are fine companies in their own right...however, being small-to-medium-sized at best, they too are doubtless struggling in the current economic climate, which means they, like all other businesses, will be cutting back their spending if they've got any sense. Which means the top line will be receding faster than Brad Voth's hairline-a trend which, we can assume, is replicated to some degree all over the country.

And yet, despite this, the clubs continue, seemingly, to think "well, we can charge the same as we did when the fans packing our rinks were lighting their period-break cigarettes with spare tenners and then putting them out with their fourteenth spare bit of merchandise, just for a giggle."

Which do you want-money or fans? Because, at the current prices, you might get the money to begin with, but both that and the crowd will start to trickle away...and as for getting newbies in-it's hard enough without people worrying that it's too costly for what it is-which is a semi-professional league of a minority sport in this country.

Dropping prices down a bit may mean that a few more people move from "once or twice a month" to "every home game"-which means more guaranteed money in the coffers, bigger crowds and a hell of a PR boost for the club that does it...

But it would take balls of solid steel to try it, and, however successful team owners in Britain have been in their other businesses...are they a) willing to bite the bullet and go for it to secure themselves a sustainable sports team, or b) take the easy option knowing that there's still a hardcore of fans out there like you and me that love hockey too much to stay away from the rink, even if it means they have to cut back in other areas?

I suspect the answer, driven by the cold hard reality that owners run clubs as businesses, not as labours of love, and there is no room for fandom in finance, is b).

And that could ensure that the owners, while thinking they're ensuring their clubs survival in these hard times, are actually slowly but surely choking the life out of both their teams and the sport in Britain itself. At least in its current form.

To take inspiration from no less a source than Top Gear, who produced this awesome, dark and foreboding view of how the recession has affected the part of life that is more about soul than money for their ending to the last series on Sunday....

Maybe, for British hockey too, we could be seeing an ending...

Keep keeping your eye on the puck.